In one of Jesus' stories a Pharisee, standing by himself, prays to God: "God, I thank you that I am not like other people" (lk 18:11).
That's a prayer we often pray. "I'm glad I'm not like him, her, or them. I am lucky not to belong to that family, that country, or that race. I am blessed not to be part of that company, that team, or that crowd!" Most of this prayer is unceasing! Somewhere we are always comparing ourselves with others, trying to convince ourselves that we are better off than they are. It is a prayer that wells up from our fearful selves and guides many of our thoughts and actions.
But this is a very dangerous prayer. It leads from compassion to competition, from competition to rivalry, from rivalry to violence, from violence to war, from war to destruction. It is a prayer that lies all the time, because we are not the difference we try so hard to find. No, our deepest identity is rooted where we are like other people- weak, broken, sinful, but sons and daughters of God.
- Excerpt from Henri Nouwen's sabbatical journal
Monday, May 11, 2015
Friday, April 3, 2015
Jesus Didn't Die for Us
"Jesus died for us." Those of us with Christian backgrounds have heard this before.
But on Good Friday I just want to pause for a minute an give a voice to some of my doubts.
There is no better time than Good Friday to have a doubt or two.
So, here goes:
Do I really believe that?
That Jesus died for us? And does Jesus' death matter? I mean, if I'm gonna die too... what good is someone dying for us? If in the end... in 15 years, 15 months, 15 days, or for some, 15 seconds from now we will all end up in the realm of the dead, what is the point?
What is today about? As I revisit the story, I am starting to suspect something that may look like doubt to some. Something new that would change everything.
... maybe Jesus didn't die for us...
As in, in exchange for us. As in, for our sin. As in, one for one, transactional death to pay the penalty for those things we owed God because we were born in sin.
That pay-the-penalty Jesus is easy to need and hard to love.
And regarding this "born into sin" concept, I have some real issues with that. Being born some way shouldn't instill guilt in anyone. After all, no one can help how they are born.
I think there is a reason why the oldest folks left first when Jesus said, “Whoever hasn’t sinned should throw the first stone*" to those who were accusing the woman caught in adultery.
We older folks know that it is harder to condemn absolutely, black-and-whitely, hard and fast sins. The older I get, the more grey everything becomes; but maybe it is just my vision going bad.
Regardless, the more I understand about life and the more I live, the less willing I am to throw a stone at a prostitute. Because, well, that prostitute might be me.
I think that is what Jesus was getting at on Good Friday... "Solidarity."
Or in more Nazarene terms, "Holiness"
Or in more hippie terms, "Wholeness"
Or in more eastern religious terms, "Oneness."
What if Jesus didn't die in exchange for us but in solidarity with us.
What if he subjected himself to backstabbing, injustice, hatred, holy rage and irresponsible use of government power because his children have been subjected to those things and he wasn't going to exempt himself because he could have escaped them.
He became one (whole, holy) with the Father when he said, "Thy will be done"
What if he entered the karma, the consequences, the result of selfishness, hatred, war and injustice even when he didn't deserve it in order to unify the sacred and the secular.
Everything was reborn with the potential for holiness (oneness, wholeness) when the curtain in the Holy of Holies was torn in two from top to bottom.
What if he shared in our shattered self images that come from interacting and experiencing our own evils, our own wills that would rather be done, our own conflicted and divided selves, our own self-loathing, our own suicides and the illnesses that dualistically fight within our bodies.
In the experience on the cross, Jesus, the eternal being, became non-being. The ultimate paradox that makes possible the unifying of our divided selves into our wholistic (holy, one) self.
Did you hear that? God is dead.
If you want a reason to doubt on Good Friday, here you go: GOD IS DEAD.
God cannot not die. God can die.
God did die.
God didn't not die because he did not want to. God died though God didn't want to.
God died so God could be one with those who had already died (and those who will die)
God died and the curtain opened to everything's holiness potential
God died and "gave up his Spirit" (makes you wonder, to whom?)
God died next to humans and alongside all humanity
So we could be one, as he is one (whole, holy)
Finally. (my translation of: "it is finished")
If Jesus died for us, it was in a different way that commonly taught. If Jesus died for us, it was to be with us in all the demons that we know, all the death-acts we take part in and in the place we are all headed toward.
*John 8:7 CEB
** She goes by the church universal
But on Good Friday I just want to pause for a minute an give a voice to some of my doubts.
There is no better time than Good Friday to have a doubt or two.
So, here goes:
Do I really believe that?
That Jesus died for us? And does Jesus' death matter? I mean, if I'm gonna die too... what good is someone dying for us? If in the end... in 15 years, 15 months, 15 days, or for some, 15 seconds from now we will all end up in the realm of the dead, what is the point?
What is today about? As I revisit the story, I am starting to suspect something that may look like doubt to some. Something new that would change everything.
... maybe Jesus didn't die for us...
As in, in exchange for us. As in, for our sin. As in, one for one, transactional death to pay the penalty for those things we owed God because we were born in sin.
That pay-the-penalty Jesus is easy to need and hard to love.
And regarding this "born into sin" concept, I have some real issues with that. Being born some way shouldn't instill guilt in anyone. After all, no one can help how they are born.
I think there is a reason why the oldest folks left first when Jesus said, “Whoever hasn’t sinned should throw the first stone*" to those who were accusing the woman caught in adultery.
We older folks know that it is harder to condemn absolutely, black-and-whitely, hard and fast sins. The older I get, the more grey everything becomes; but maybe it is just my vision going bad.
Regardless, the more I understand about life and the more I live, the less willing I am to throw a stone at a prostitute. Because, well, that prostitute might be me.
I think that is what Jesus was getting at on Good Friday... "Solidarity."
Or in more Nazarene terms, "Holiness"
Or in more hippie terms, "Wholeness"
Or in more eastern religious terms, "Oneness."
What if Jesus didn't die in exchange for us but in solidarity with us.
What if he subjected himself to backstabbing, injustice, hatred, holy rage and irresponsible use of government power because his children have been subjected to those things and he wasn't going to exempt himself because he could have escaped them.
What if he entered the karma, the consequences, the result of selfishness, hatred, war and injustice even when he didn't deserve it in order to unify the sacred and the secular.
Everything was reborn with the potential for holiness (oneness, wholeness) when the curtain in the Holy of Holies was torn in two from top to bottom.
What if he shared in our shattered self images that come from interacting and experiencing our own evils, our own wills that would rather be done, our own conflicted and divided selves, our own self-loathing, our own suicides and the illnesses that dualistically fight within our bodies.
In the experience on the cross, Jesus, the eternal being, became non-being. The ultimate paradox that makes possible the unifying of our divided selves into our wholistic (holy, one) self.
Did you hear that? God is dead.
If you want a reason to doubt on Good Friday, here you go: GOD IS DEAD.
God cannot not die. God can die.
God did die.
God didn't not die because he did not want to. God died though God didn't want to.
God died so God could be one with those who had already died (and those who will die)
God died and the curtain opened to everything's holiness potential
God died and "gave up his Spirit" (makes you wonder, to whom?)
God died next to humans and alongside all humanity
So we could be one, as he is one (whole, holy)
Finally. (my translation of: "it is finished")
If Jesus died for us, it was in a different way that commonly taught. If Jesus died for us, it was to be with us in all the demons that we know, all the death-acts we take part in and in the place we are all headed toward.
It was for solidarity's sake.
Because he didn't condemn the prostitute: he married her***John 8:7 CEB
** She goes by the church universal
Tuesday, February 17, 2015
Under the Juniper Tree
1 Kings 19:4-8 (NRSV)
But he himself went a day’s journey into the wilderness, and came and sat down under a solitary broom tree. He asked that he might die: “It is enough; now, O Lord, take away my life, for I am no better than my ancestors.” Then he lay down under the broom tree and fell asleep. Suddenly an angel touched him and said to him, “Get up and eat.” He looked, and there at his head was a cake baked on hot stones, and a jar of water. He ate and drank, and lay down again. The angel of the Lord came a second time, touched him, and said, “Get up and eat, otherwise the journey will be too much for you.” He got up, and ate and drank; then he went in the strength of that food forty days and forty nights to Horeb the mount of God. Here on the cusp of this Lenten season, I thought it appropriate to reflect on this passage as we prepare our hearts for this journey of lent. Carlo Carretto reflects on what happens here: "'Leave me, Lord.' But, instead, the Lord says: 'Get up and eat, else the journey will be too long for you.' This food given to Elijah on the edge of the desert may be seen as the symbol of a food which is to nourish man: The Blessed Sacrament. And it will nourish him with eternal life and take him beyond the frontiers of this world. The frontier is represented by the desert: 'he walked forty days and forty nights to the mountain of God, Horeb.' In biblical language forty signifies many, many.... Patience is necessary to cross the desert; commitment is necessary for the purification the desert brings. Above all, the desert means 'to renounce'. Yes, renounce these stupidities upon which we have wanted to build our poor existence; renounce those ideas we have been clinging to; above all, renounce that attitude we have had towards heaven and towards earth: 'I was right; you'll see I was right!'"
As we ready to enter into this season may we find our nourishment in the food provided through Christ our Lord.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)